Motherhood & Small Changes

New Clock & Football Canvas

I bought a new clock for the kitchen this past weekend and my son doesn't like it. He let me know by commenting that the previous clock was like a mansion and the new one is like a run down shack. Making me laugh wasn't his goal, but that's what he did. The old clock was a huge double circle of plywood with the numbers and words adhered around the edges. It had a coffee cup with hands in the middle as the time piece. I went to an enclosed unit, that looks like an antique, with blue flecked paint.

Children don't like change. Introducing small changes a little at a time, baby steps, helps them to accept changes around them. For example I had begun to change the items on the said wall a few months ago. The framed photographs that had populated the wall were replaced with large canvas photographs of my son, one pitching in a baseball game, which he loved, and one of him as a running back with the ball weaving between the other team's defense, which he didn't really care for. After basketball season was over I chose two photos from it to add to the collection, one of him running and dribbling the ball, and one of him slapping hands as he was called off of the bench as a starter. But to add these photos the layont needed to change and a new clock was in order. I guess that was just too much at once. I should have did either one, add the clock or the two new canvas, but not both. With a small change he may have retained a sense of control and eased into the transition.

Kids need to believe that everything is solid for them to feel safe. Fear of change is often fear of losing control. Since it is a good idea to validate their feelings about the change and therefore demonstrate understanding, I let my son gripe about his disliking of some of the photos and of the clock. Then I explained that because it is my (our) home and I liked the items that it's okay that he doesn't when I do and that is the reasonable way to live. Note: Hubby during all of this is sitting along the sidelines not giving a hoot either way. Children need to be able to accept change as they grow into adults, to be able to live a full life on their own.